American Bedu

Not all Saudi men are cads.  In fact the majority are decent, charming, sincere and loving individuals just to name a few applicable adjectives.  But some on the other hand should wear a permanently affixed warning sign identifying him as a professional heartbreaker!

Saudi men can undoubtedly be among the most charming in the world.  A woman being courted by a Saudi man will feel that she is the only woman in the world and treated like a Princess.  As a result, romantic relationships between a non-Saudi woman (usually a westerner) and a Saudi man can evolve quickly with much passion and fireworks.  Saudi men seem to be born with the ability to charm and conjule.  Some may make promises that they realize they have no intention of keeping but they justify this by saying to themselves “if it makes her feel better to hear such words then no harm is done.”  When I learn of situations where a woman has been so terribly let down by a Saudi man it saddens me.  There are too many stories out there about the western woman who basically has been “hoodwinked” by the charm and charisma of a Saudi man who in fact did not have serious intentions to the woman.  I call these men the Romantic Liars. 

What is a Romantic Liar?  There are in fact articles written about these men with warning signs.  I’ve included some clues that a woman should be watchful and alert to towards determining if something just might be amiss in her relationship with a Saudi man:

First, romantic liars are very good at what I call information control. So that’s the first sign — if your partner knows far more about you than you know about him, there’s a chance there’s a hidden agenda in play.

Another sign is the presence of a lot of “impression management” — you have an idea of what your partner is like, but you’ve never really had any of the information verified.

A third sign — and this seems to apply in so many cases — deceptive relationships usually take off like a rocket … like love at first sight, if you know what I mean. nuclear powered…..

Another sign is all the “tending and narrowing” that takes place in the relationship. Romantic liars have a built-in need to keep their partners on a short leash — out of contact with the real world — out of contact with people who might know the truth. As a result, it is common for romantic liars to go to some rather extraordinary lengths to limit a victim’s contact with friends, family, co-workers, etc. 

Finally, a very strong sign that you’re mixed up with a romantic liar is that your intuition will eventually signal you. That’s just the way it usually works.

It is natural for someone to want to confront a romantic liar — the desire can be overwhelming. But you couldn’t make a bigger mistake.

I would tell anyone to simply exit the relationship as soon as possible, saying as little as possible. It is safe to assume that some of these characters have some strong narcissistic tendencies. Let someone in that category know that you’ve caught them in a lie and you should take cover. Many romantic liars become very abusive when they are confronted.

And probably the first thing a woman should do is find someone she can tell her story to — a trusted friend, family member, therapist — someone who will be very high on the trust level. It has to be someone in that category because that’s what this is all about.

For more information about Romantic liars, please see this link.

Filed under: friendship, relationships, Saudi customs | Tagged: Heartbreak, Love, romance | 92 Comments »