One thing rarely talked about but does happen sometimes within the Kingdom is when a young Saudi woman loses her virginity. This is a tragedy for the woman and her family. Her chances of an acceptable marriage are virtually gone if it were ever suspected she was no longer a virgin. If a loss of virginity became known, not only would the young woman be disgraced but so would her family. The family would be perceived as having no control over her daughter or having taught her right from wrong. Yet in spite of these teachings and cultural repercussions some young women have given in to desire and lost their virginity.
In some cases a young woman may have lost her virginity to the man with whom she is engaged. Perhaps her family was more open and liberal in allowing her to have time alone and unaccompanied with him. He may have persistently encouraged her that soon they would be married so why wait. Weren’t they already viewed as husband and wife? This is probably one of the oldest lines a young woman with romantic visions of love in her head will fall for. However what does not occur to her is that after having given in to the bodily desires of the man, it is as if she has crossed a red line and he can not look at her the same. Now the betrothed has become a “loose woman” whom he can no longer trust. If she gave her most precious gift to him prior to marriage how can he they possibly trust her after they are married. He tells his family he can no longer marry her. He’ll likely keep quiet as to the true reason why but then it leaves the woman frightened and having to face many questions from her family members.
Regardless of how a woman may have lost her virginity prior to marriage it is a disaster. Unless a man has married a divorcee or a widow, blood is expected on the sheets the day after the wedding night. In some traditional families the sheets are collected and displayed as part of the celebration that the marriage has been consummated, uniting the families and illustrating the pureness of the woman.
Loss of virginity prior to marriage in turn created a “black” industry within (and outside) of Saudi Arabia. Because it is illegal, a black market comprised of either foreign doctors or foreign nurses exist who “restore” the hymen, ensuring that for all intents and purposes, a woman’s virginity has been restored and her blood will flow on the sheets during her wedding night.
They” “hymen restorers” are aware of the risks that they take in performing such services. They know they can be jailed, lashed and banned forever from the Kingdom. Yet their greed and some may say their compassion for the women persuade them to overlook the risks. These hymen restorers will operate by word-of-mouth and they will be highly suspicious of anyone who may randomly call their mobile phone seeking help. They will rely on pre-paid phones and leave no trace to their true identity. Most will not have an office and there is no guarantee that their services would be performed in a sterile environment. They will not reveal their true name.
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