Pregnancy and childbirth customs are more traditional and conservative in the Kingdom than perhaps most other places. To my knowledge I am not yet aware of any hospitals or clinics which offer childbirth classes for couples. The tradition is such that when the wife goes into labor she will be admitted to the hospital where perhaps a female family member and the hospital staff will assist her through her labor and delivery. The husbands are not by their wives side and instead usually wait in a male-only waiting area for the news of the birth. If a woman is giving birth in a government-run hospital, this practice of no men in the labor/delivery area is further enforced because the woman is in a female ward with other women in the same condition (labor and giving birth) with the Saudi practice of unrelated men and women must remain separated from seeing one another. But of course, after the woman has given birth, she is moved to a room (which may or may not be private) where male family members are allowed to visit her and see the new baby. Separation of unrelated men and women will be maintained through the use of opaque curtains concealing other women who may be in the ward.
When the woman is discharged from the hospital, depending on the conservatism and traditions of the Saudi family, she may be released and go immediately to her parents home. Many Saudi families practice what is refered to as the “40 day rule.” After a woman gives birth, the woman is expected to have 40 days in which she rests and her body heals before she is viewed as ready to return to her home and sharing a bed with her husband. During this 40 day period, the husband may naturally come and spend time visiting with his wife and child but he will not stay or share a bed with her. And again, I reiterate this practice is not necessarily followed by all Saudis but some.
Such practices are indeed a contrast with the Western practices where the father is pretty much expected to be in both the labor and delivery rooms with his wife. Classes and training are given to the couple during the pregnancy so the father can be a pro-active coach to his wife. And in many cases, it may be the father who gets to first hold the newborn child and then present their child to the new mother. Of course such an experience forges an incredible bond between the new family – mother, father and child. If these practices take place perhaps in some of the private hospitals in the Kingdom, then I am not aware of it.
I’d like to hear from all readers and particularly the Saudi readers. How do the Saudi men and women feel about the practices of childbirth in the Kingdom? If given a choice, would a Saudi man prefer to be there throughout his wife’s pregnancy and delivery? Do Saudi women prefer to have the husband there or do they feel more comfortable knowing he will not see them during labor? And of course, for those of you who did share as a couple the birth of a child, please share your views on this experience as well.
Filed under: gender, relationships, Saudi Arabia, Saudi customs | 134 Comments »
